Victory Is In Sight - But What's the Cost?

A continuation of the previous blogpost - 6:20AM, sky just lightening up, and I really need to go to bed - getting too emotional and droopy. And probably have my emotional set skewed with a minor case of flu.

I'll say this. Over the past two years, since I was guided (both by rational logic and inner "nudging") to focus on Unveiling completion, I have been supported by the universe, or Source. And for that, I am most grateful and thankful. My health, miraculously, has been stronger than ever. My car has run smoothly and well. The house has had heat in the winter, and A/C in the summer. My cats and I have not yet missed a meal.

I've had emotional support from dear friends and family. That's counted for a lot.

For about a year, one of the co-residents in my household was a very sweet, dear man who loved to cook - and he not only cooked for me, but bought the food. I am so everylastingly grateful and thankful! Much of that time, I was not only not making much money with being an adjunct professor at one of the local universities, but I didn't have the time or inclination to shop and cook. (I did have an inclination to eat, though, and he supported me tremendously on that account.)

Over the past two years, family and friends have very generously been my "life support," providing emotional and physical support as needed - and often, I needed a lot.

That said, this journey has largely been one that I've done alone.

There's breakthrough stuff in this book. It's got the answers that I was looking for, back when I started some sixteen years ago. (First chapter drafts had copyright 1996 at the bottom of the pages.)

But the more that I've worked on this, the lonelier it has been. And the past two years have been a very lonely process. Not just a solitary journey, but a lonely one.

By and by, there's been noone with whom to share the little victories and triumphs, and no one to "vetch" with when things were slow and tedious, or when I realized that a chapter (or the whole book) needed yet another rewrite.

And soon, very soon, this actual writing/editing/proofing/indexing stage will be done. I'll continue writing, of course, but it will be other stuff. (Am already mentally putting together a study guide for the actual "pathworking" in context of dance training; musings along those lines will be at my Alay'nya Blog. And there will be a whole lot more interaction; a lot more socializing, and I'll remember back fondly to the days when all that I had to do was to isolate myself and write.

But that will be in the future. Right now, it's still the final final stages of this journey, far enough along so that if I died today, the book would still appear. (Minus an index, of course.) There would still be value.

And as I look back, I'm saying - there's been support, yes, but by and large I've done it alone. And it's been a lonely journey. I've been an Amazon warrior - nearly without break - for over two years now, and it's been tough going.

I will, however, give credit to Kate H., who has been my editor since this last summer, and who has given (and still does give) very generously with her time.

And this last Sunday, we had our first Cognoscenti Reception - a gathering of the "inner core." About a dozen people, and very good - all connected with developing this book in one way or another.

And I had help - very freely and generously given - from those who did a digital video shoot with me last autumn; Kate, Alice, and Melissa all helped with stage-sets and costumes, and videographer Kirene shot the raw footage. Ken. S., a professor of multimedia studies at GMU's Applied IT Dept., had various student teams try their hand at editing together a "digital video book trailer." We saw their efforts for the first time this last Sunday. Good tries. Not what I'll want as a final product, but a good effort and gave us some idea of what can be done.

My friend Dingwall F., and his friend Carlos, are working on a musical score that will be the Unveiling theme music.

So - over this past half-year - Unveiling has become more of a community process. The writing, both initially and now, is solitary. Writing a book is not done by a committee. (As Goethe said, "Genius requires solitude." I've clung to that phrase over the past several years.)

But everything wrapping around the actual writing does indeed involve many people, and more all the time. Editor. Costume and stage, and videographer. Video editors - both the professor/coach and the students.

And now, I'm getting more business interest in this as well.

So it's interesting. And getting more congenial. And becoming more warm-and-fuzzy, a little less Amazon. And on that happy note, having been up since 2AM, and dealing with a mild case of (mood-impacting) flu, I'm going back go bed.